How to Turn Your Circumstances Into Opportunities For Growth
I have never experienced more trauma than I have in the last three months, and though, I have also been met with an equal amount of transformation.
The greatest tool to gain in personal and leadership development is the deep knowing that we have choice, regardless of what we’re going through.
STAYING STAGNANT IS A CHOICE.
We can use what is happening in our lives as an opportunity to up-level OR slip away into old ways of being, leading, and communicating. I’m not typically one to give “advice”, but I’m going to anyways.
CHOOSE TRANSFORMATION.
The more I talk to people about their experiences right now, the more I realize how easily people allow themselves to stay stuck. In this blog post, you will discover how you can step out of a place of stagnancy, and instead, a realm of growth.
In order to see our circumstances as an opportunity to transform, we first have to..
ACKNOWLEDGE them
Acknowledging what we’re going through may seem obvious, but a very small percentage of people actually do this. When we go through something challenging or experience an unwanted emotion, our first instinct is to avoid, numb, and distract (check yo’ screen time).
Little do we realize, this actually prolongs the feelings we don’t want to feel. Suppression leads to intense resurfacing.
Ask yourself: What would be the possible if you stopped resisting what’s happening and instead, allowed yourself to process it.
The other day, my trauma coach was explaining to me how a lot of the dialogue we have around our circumstances is both irrational and rational at the same time.
“Something irrational happened. In turn, you have had irrational thoughts. Those thoughts are also rational because something irrational happened, so you want to protect yourself if something similar happens again. Then you start thinking, ‘If my trust could be taken away so easily by someone I loved and trusted, then it could be taken away by other people I love and trust’. You make that narrative around your trauma and you start to live by this to stay safe.”
I don’t know about you, but I still get goosebumps after reading that for the 20th time.
Regardless of how good or bad your circumstances are, this speaks to the importance of acknowledging what we’re going through, our response to it, and how our word shapes our reality.
WHY THIS MATTERS
The irrational thoughts become truth in our minds and stories we tell ourselves to make ourselves feel safe. That story bleeds into how we communicate, the extent in which we trust others, how vulnerable we are, and how we lead.
let your values lead you
Feeling stuck? Act from your values. Don’t know what to do? Act from your values.Feeling unmotivated? Act from your values. In challenging times, our values act as a backbone to halting indecision, lack of motivation, burnout, and so much more.
Living by our values is an essential part of growing, especially when we don’t want to. The trick is to want growth and long-term sanity more than your desire to numb, fight, and resist.
TAP INTO REALITY
The limiting beliefs are a result of our inability to discern delusion from reality. We are not present, we forget the tools we already know and numb to the things we know are true.
Ask yourself: is that story or belief really true?
Regardless, how much of this experience are you willing to let control your life?
Sometimes you can do all the right steps and it still won’t turn your mood around. Something it will do though, is produce internal growth, even if it doesn’t feel like it. The more you do it, the more easeful it gets.
Real growth often feels shitty. There’s no life proof solution. Sometimes you have to sit in your circumstances and know the only thing you can do is to be the person that stays in integrity with your purpose when shit hits the fan.
Quarantine Regards,
Tay Lauren